“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me - just as the Father knows me and I know the Father - and I lay down my life for the sheep. I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also. They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd."
John 10:14-16
I was driving to work the other day thinking about how difficult this time of year is for me. While many rejoice in Christ’s resurrection, I still find it hard to get past the horrible suffering of His death on the cross. I am forever grateful and amazed and in awe and well just can’t find the right word to describe how I feel about what He did for us. But joyful isn’t one of the words I use to describe how I feel. This is one area I see as me being an immature Christian. That’s ok, I hope to always be growing and maturing in my faith.
So, I’m driving to work and thinking about this and asking myself… “Would I die for my daughter, my grandchild?” Here was my answer to myself, “Yes I would but please let it be quick and painless.” So even in a bit of selflessness, I’m still selfish! I didn’t like my answer but it’s the truth. Then I started to compare that to what Jesus endured for us. How He suffered beyond belief and not for any wrong doing of His own. Then I thought about how He not only died for the sins of His immediate children (The Jews), but he died for ALL of our sins. In the above verse Jesus says that he will not only lay down His life for the sheep in His pen, but for other sheep. Those who He knows and will listen to His voice… they will all become one flock. Wow! Back to me… would I die for other people’s children? Willingly put my life on the line for someone I never met?
To me this is just one teeny tiny example of how I will never come close to being like Christ. I would like to spend the rest of my days on earth trying to better myself and following His Word, but I best not ever dare compare myself to Him. Or, think that He’s anything like me. The closest we get to being alike is He walked on the earth and I do too… and we were born of Jewish faith which makes me proud. I hope my family reads that… who would have thought that I would have ever said I’m proud of my Jewish heritage? And especially after becoming a Christian!
Ok, I wandered a bit here.
As Easter approaches and we get ready to “celebrate”, I find my mood becoming more and more somber about the events to come. Oh, I’ll get caught up in the joy of Easter morning as we sing and worship… and maybe this year I will walk away able to hold on to that joy and see the resurrection of my Lord and Savior in a different light.
~ Lord, thank you for what you did, and do, for us. I know I can never imagine what you endured and how you did it willingly; all I can do is praise and worship and try to be a good disciple. Please be with me and guide me to be the best person I can be for You! I ask this in Your name, Amen.~
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